Hollywood Tales.

     Since the dawn of time, Hollywood has been the Mecca of the movie industry. It all started out when Charlie Chaplin signed his one million dollar contract in 1918, and it's been going on full power since then. Many do talk about Bollywood and its constant sprawl, but I am pretty sure that most people would rather watch a muscular American say ''Die M***********'' as opposed to little people dressed like Freemasons crying on each other's shoulders. Sadly however, I may soon refer to watching little men with a moustache, because the Hollywood giant seems to be in a great slump.
     You see, two days ago I went to see the new movie called ''Skyline'', and in essence it is just a pathetic re-make of ''War Of The Worlds''. Yes, the special effects were great but then, these days even children can program and hack computers. I take this movie as nothing but a big fat cliche, not only because the aliens looked like human excrements covered in jelly, but because the Actors looked more plastic than a Chinese's firm product portfolio. The plot could've been written by a Chemistry teacher, and it still was going to be more engaging, but it's not like I had enough time to marvel at its awfulness, because the movie itself was shorter than a 20th century silent film.
     Seriously, that was truly and honestly, the worst movie I have ever seen, and to describe its terribleness, I shall use a rather immature phrase that I heard once: ''I'd rather take a dump in my hand, and watch it dry for an hour and twenty minutes.'' Yes, that is how I felt after the movie finished. Now, of course there is a demand for these films, and I do not judge ''Skyline'' because it is bad. I judge it because it is bad but tries to be serious all along. And I am sorry, but the only thing worse than a film starring four people with a set reduced to three cars and a couple of hotel rooms, is herpes. And to be honest, the last time I hurdled that much abuse at a screen was when watching ''Loose Women''.
     The thing is, most movies these days are usually based around women with moons for breasts and cocktail sticks for legs, and men with rectangular cheekbones, and more muscle than brain. It really would've been so much better if there were still films like ''The Shawshank Redemption'' and ''The Bucket List''. Films that are worth your time, and can bring a tear to your eye.